Question of the Day: Can Age really be a Problem in a Relationship

Age differences in relationships have caused many love relationships to end even before they could start.

For many men and women but especially women, the age gap between them and someone they wish to date or marry matters to them a lot.

And while age difference mostly bothers men in one way it bothers women in two different ways:

• When they are older than a relationship or marriage prospect.


• When a relationship or marriage prospect is much older than they feel comfortable with.

For the men it's usually a question of:

Can they date or marry a lady older than them? It matters to them less if they're much older than a woman. In fact many men would prefer it that way.

Age Difference in Marriage

The tradition or what is expected is that a man be reasonably older than the woman he's dating or chooses to marry. And I guess that makes sense since a man is supposed to be the head of the woman it only seem reasonable that he be older. However some men and women have demonstrated that it doesn't have to be. They believe love matters most in the success of a relationship than some numbers game. Some of these men have gone ahead to marry women older than them and women married men much younger than them. No matter how much the society frowns at it, it's a trend that has come to stay.

Some Couples with Age gap between them

There are many couples across the world with age gap between them, average citizens and celebrities; but especially celebrities. And the celebrities have been more daring in age gaps they settle for. Some even have over a decade age gap between them and their women, the men being the younger in the relationship.

Some Celebrity Men Who Married Older Women

Soul E and Ure Queen Okezie. Ure was 11 years older than Soul E. I'm not sure if they actually got married but they surely were in a relationship for sometime.

Peter Okoye of P-Square musical duo and Lola Omotayo. Lola is said to be 6 years older than Peter. Peter and his twin brother Paul was born 18 November 1981. Although as to Lola's date of birth, no one is saying. Lola and Peter are yet to be married they've had two children together, a son and a daughter. And they continue to maintain their relationship.

Update:

Lola Omotayo and Peter Okoye of Psquare are now married. Peter proposed to Lola with a Range Rover Envogue early August, 2013. They got married Sunday, November 17, 2013 at the Ark Event Centre, Lekki, Lagos, Nigeria. A wedding that was attended by many of the big names in Nigeria Entertainment industry.

Dare Art-Alade and his wife Deola Ayeni. Deola is 8 years older than Darey yet they've been married for over 5 years and so far had two children together.

Usher Raymond and Tameka Foster. Tameka is 8 years older than Usher. Yet they were once married and had two children together.

Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey. Mariah is 11 years older than her husband Nick yet they've been married for some years now and the couple had a set of twin on their third year wedding anniversary.

So…

Does Age Differences in Relationships Affect the Success of the Relationships?

If I have to answer to that question right away I'll have to say Yes, a couples age difference can affect the success of their marriage and No it can't. That must sound confusing for you but if you keep reading I'll clarify that in a bit.

Yes it can affect the relationship if both parties are not comfortable about the age difference especially the man if he's younger; because then he's likely to over react to everything the woman says or does easily taking it as a sign of disrespect something he probably wouldn't have read any meaning to if it was coming from someone he was older than.

For example he could take it as being disrespected because he's younger even when the woman was only trying to make a joke about something. And also because he's younger he may always try to do things to prove he's head in this house which could be too much to handle by the woman. And you can't fault him because in the society we find ourselves men who marry older women are always under pressure to prove that despite they are younger they are the head in their household.

And for the relationship of older women who are married to younger men to work, the woman must be willing to be extra submissive so that she is not always misunderstood as being disrespectful to her husband because he's younger. So she has to be twice as humble and ready to give her partner the respect he deserves. And usually this is hard to do especially when these women are well to do in the society and worst if they are richer than their mate. It's never easy to make a relationship work when the woman is richer and more influential than the husband and this is true even in the traditional age gap relationships. Men in such relationships are quick to feel inferior and neglected.

So these age gap relationships have more challenges to cope with.

And No, it won't affect the success of such relationships because it's like any other relationship; for it to work both parties have to put equal amount of effort. And if an age gap relationship doesn't work out it's not necessarily because of the age difference in the relationship; though it's easier to conclude that way.

For example Usher's marriage to Tameka ended because of issues of infidelity. And that's something common with many relationships especially celebrities relationships.

Darey Art Alade's marriage with Deola and that of Nick Cannon to Mariah are some of the best examples that age gap doesn't have to matter in a marriage. These couples are having the best times of their lives together. Proof that couples can still have successful marriages even with many years between them.

     Dear readers this is an issue in our society today and I really want to know what you think about it.As a guy can you date a girl older than you? And for the ladies can you date a guy younger than you?.